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Bizarre Portable Game Commercials: Episode One
Written by Chris Buffa on Friday, June 27, 2008
These video game commercials make us vomit in amusement.
Pokemon Yellow: Special Pikachu Edition (Game Boy)
There's no better way to kick off this list than with a Japanese Pokemon commercial, especially one that fuses a cartoon Meowth into the real world. Seems like he's upset that Pikachu has its own video game and is drinking himself into a milk coma. Hey Meowth, watch out where you point that stick.
Link's Awakening rap (Game Boy)
Wow. Nothing makes us more inclined to buy Link's Awakening than an official Zelda rap by some guy that rips off every hip hop artist from 1990-1999. "A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do". Damn right.
Dr. Mario (Game Boy)
First, this Dr. Mario ad isn't nearly as excellent as the NES one, but it definitely has its moments. Again, Nintendo uses song to peddle its wares and we love them for it. Witch doctors, shrunken heads and one awful yellow shirt make this commercial amazing.
Sega Game Gear
Back when Sega was the cool kid on the block, it launched a series of ads targeting Nintendo as being slow and behind the times. Case in point, this Game Gear commercial, which features a Game Boy fan whacking himself in the head so his games are in color. That's cool, but why is the Nintendo guy a fat dork while the Game Gear dude is a skinny dork? Seems like Sega has a message for Mario fan boys.
Star Wars: Episode 1 Racer (Game Boy Color)
First, Episode 1 Racer isn't nearly as good as this commercial implies. Second, your Game Boys won't actually sprout pod racer attachments and fly, which means we should have sued Nintendo a long time ago. Third, to whoever made this ad, thanks for mostly showing us the title screen to hide how awful this piece of garbage is.
Squirrels and their nuts: PSP
We can't hate Sony for its weird PSP commercials. Yeah, their slogans are stupid ("It's like a nut you can play with outside"), but they're hilarious in a "I'm drunk and this is hilarious" only way. Actually, it's more like a "It's 3AM, I'm drunk, need McDonalds and think this PSP squirrel commercial is hilarious".
More squirrels, dust balls and other strange PSP shenanigans
There's no reason to deprive you of more PSP commercials, so here's a sweet compilation of all the sick, twisted black and white PSP ads we could find. "Hells yeah".
Annoying plane trip (PSP)
By now, it should be obvious that Sony is the big daddy king of strange commercials. Here's a nice collection of its PSP airplane ads. We feel for the dude in red. If we were him, we'd clock that jerk in the face and have air marshals on us in two seconds. "Cluster bomb! Cluster bomb!"
Star Wars Battlefront (PSP)
Tight elevators suck enough without some creepy guy harassing you over playing PSP. It's hysterical that he compliments the other guy for having a "nice unit" while near his crotch. We see what you did there, Sony.
Super Mario Land 2: Six Golden Coins (Game Boy)
Whoah! Wario is all hypnotic in this ad. Yes Wario, we will not let Mario reach the castle. Yes Wario, we will not let him find the six golden coins. Yes Wario, we will obey. OBEY. OBEYYYYYYYY.
Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3 (Game Boy)
Wario makes the list twice for rubbing all over the Eiffel Tower and shooting lasers from his funky hat. We also dig how he erupts from the Game Boy and spews coins all over the place. Then Mario sends him into orbit. Oh, and it's in a language other than English, which means it's even more incredible.
Game Boy commercial
Nintendo debuts Game Boy to the masses with this sci-fi themed commercial where some douche in a denim jacket gets beamed into another world and battles a robot in a heated Tetris match. Then the kid beats his opponent by shooting a laser from his finger. We consider that cheating.
Yet another Game Boy commercial
We don't know if this is real or fan made. What we do know is it came from Brazil, features a guy that looks like every Nintendo fan boy and he rambles on while sound effects play in the background. Toss in just a few seconds of game play footage and you have yourself some crap.
